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My goals for the future is to obtain a teaching/librarian job, lose weight, own a house, and to travel the world.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Day 78: Before the Panic Rises

I have put myself in a difficult spot...agian.  The usual pattern that I have maintained since middle school which is to shove off my homework until the last possible moment.  Only now I am grad school...why haven't I learned?  Will I ever learn?  This is the last week of the term and everything is due this Sunday.  While I am slowly crawling my way out from under a pile of homework, I am not seeing sunshine yet.  Therefore, my immediate reaction is to run and hide which equates to distracting myself with everything else but my homework.  Yet I know within my soul that I absolutely cannot fail...I must finish by Sunday evening.  So am trying to calm myself down before the panic rises to the surface.  What if I can't finish?  Last summer the same thing happened and I took some incompletes, so that is not an option for this time. 

I have to finish and I have to calm down before the panic rises.

Before the panic rises....

I am trying to imagine the immense sense of relief when I do finish.  If I survived basic training, I can survive this...before the panic rises.

Send me some encouragment please...


  1. You can do this !! Get the bulldog willpower that is within you --- I know you have what it takes !! Once when I was feeling like I was going to fail all I needed was someone to say, "Lynn, You can do this !!!" and I felt I was 1 grain of sand away from failure --- but then I kept telling myself over and over --- I can do it and then I did it !! Sooooo ---- I'm telling you now, "YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

    Just think what a privilege it is to be able to get an education such as this --- so many people would kill to be able to take courses and learn more, let alone beyond a Master's.


  2. You understand the problem of putting off your work for the last 20 plus years but yet nothing changes. Why is that?

    Most people have a problem of admitting they have problems and that prevents them from finding a solution for their failure to get ahead in life. In your case, you know the problem, and have known the problem for 20 plus years....why can't you solve it? My guess.....you lack the drive to finish the projects. So.....suck it up and cross that finish line so you can achieve your lifes dreams and goals.